It’s an option that more and more Toronto seniors are taking: Selling that house while the market is hot and downsizing to a more accessible, more centrally located condominium unit, with enough capital left over to keep your retirement comfortable. But downsizing means weighing what to do with all that stuff—furniture and mementoes that won’t fit into a more efficient space but are legitimately hard to part with.

Here are four tips for making it through the household cull—and coming out feeling lighter.

Give yourself permission to struggle

Yes, ultimately, they are just things—and that’s the attitude many people will take when whittling down their possessions for a leaner, cleaner life. But for every person who finds it easy to let go, there’s another who picks up that tablecloth and remembers the friend who gifted it, and every wonderful family dinner that started with putting it on the table.

Sometimes this can be hard. And it’s okay if it’s hard. For some of us, it’s hard to feel like losing the touchstone we’ve attached all those good memories to is losing the memories. You’ll still have that friend, and you’ll still have those family dinners, but if you need to grieve a little when passing that tablecloth on to a new home, don’t let anyone tell you that’s wrong, or unnecessary.

Evaluate the usefulness of everything

Old closet-cleaning tips can really come in handy when downsizing to a new space: If you haven’t used it in a few years, you’re very unlikely to use it again.

While it’s important to set reasonable time boundaries for yourself, pick a boundary and keep it firm: If you haven’t worn that jacket, played those old board games, used those office supplies, or read those books inside your chosen time span, hold yourself to finding them a new home.

Likewise, think about quantity. It’s easy to accumulate multiples of things when you have the storage space to keep them, but downsizing inevitably means choosing fewer things to keep, which are used more often. Decide on how many coffee mugs you will realistically ever need at one time, and cull down the ones you’ve got until you hit your target. Don’t worry about the what-if: In the sheer eventuality you need one more, you can always go and get it once you’ve figured out what your new space will accommodate.

Send it to a good home

Downsizing for a move doesn’t have to mean never seeing those items again. Children, siblings, and close friends might be happy to give the items you don’t want to take home—especially if they have their own sentimental attachments to a favourite teapot or family heirloom. If you have grandchildren or other relatives just starting out on their own, they may be happy—or may not, depending on whether they’ve got a strong sense of personal style—to take in that set of dishes as they begin their own household.

The rule of thumb here is to make sure that offering items to friends and family members will alleviate a burden—in time or money—rather than create one in storage space or obligation. Respect a no, but check within your close circles in case someone will give you an enthusiastic yes.

At its best, passing on items to willing friends or family members can make them feel considered and loved as do your downsizing, and make sure the possessions that have served you well can have a second life.

Do good with the things you shed

One of the hangups that often comes with downsizing is the idea that anything you can’t repurpose in your own networks, you have to keep. Unfortunately, like many major cities, Toronto is a city that has a lot of need—and rather than keeping those things friends and family don’t want, but you can’t throw out—you can help alleviate that need by donating them.

The City of Toronto has great listings for social service agencies seeking housewares, furniture, books, clothing, and more on its ReUseIt program website. Each listing clearly states what an organization currently needs, their contact information, and enough background to get you started on supporting causes that matter to you with a donation of the things you no longer use.

Best of luck!

You’ve found that dream condo—but it’s a little expensive for your budget, and now buddying up with a friend and sharing the place seems like a really attractive option. But finding a roommate who fits just right is just as finicky as finding a good romantic relationship, and the emotional and financial cost can be just as huge when you break up with your roommate.

So before you take the plunge, here are a few tips to consider when looking for your perfect roommate.

Think about your systems

We have systems with the people in our lives: How we make plans, how we interact together, how we solve problems when something goes wrong in the friendship or relationship. The first thing to ask when you’re eyeing a friend to potentially be a roommate is your systems of interaction: How developed are they, how solid are they, and how do they work?

In short: Can you solve problems well together, and not hate each other after you do it?

The best roommate relationships aren’t ones where you never disagree, but where you respect each other’s needs and boundaries enough—and trust each other enough—to work together to repair the issues that come up and build better systems going forward. Live with someone who you can forgive and who forgives you; live with someone you’ll sincerely do better for next time, and vice versa. But if you can’t mutually compromise or work forward with that particular friend, don’t live with them.

Talk about your respective habits

What’s the shape of your day? What’s the shape of your potential roommate’s, and are they compatible?

Sharing a space can mean a lot of different things to a lot of people: Some will want a family-style arrangement where you pool the grocery money, eat dinner together, and spend quality time, like any other household does. Some people look at roommate relationships as two people sharing a space, period, and won’t be aiming to interact with you more than any other part of their life. If you’ve got different concepts or goals for a roommate relationship, that can be very hard and put a great deal of strain on the relationship—and on your feeling of a comfortable home.

In less big-picture terms, quiz each other on your day-to-day lives. How much time is each of you at work, and when are you working? Do you have opposite shifts? Do you like to have friends over a lot and entertain, or are you more into meeting people elsewhere and keeping your home as a private space? How clean do you like a kitchen? When do you pay bills? What annoys you? What are you allergic to? If one of you is in a relationship, or gets into a relationship, what ground rules do you want to set on how their SO moves in your shared space? (No naked parts on the communal couch is a perfectly cromulent house rule.)

While you don’t need to have 100% agreement on what the proper habits for a upright and just person should be, you should have a solid base of commonality—and the ability to flex for each other on the disagreements without those disagreements being total deal-breakers.

Be clear about money

The money talk is one of the most awkward ones to have, period, but if you’re looking at living with someone, have it. Moving in with someone means forming a household, and you can’t make functional decisions without knowing what your household finances are.

Set clear guidelines together about what you can afford in rent and utilities, how you’d like to handle bills, and what your bill-paying habits are. Which utilities can you live without? Which ones are necessities? How much of a cushion do each of you have if everything goes south and you have to look for new work contracts, and are you comfortable with each other’s cushion?

Decide how the money will go, and you’ll spare yourself potential bad surprises—up to and including finding yourself on the hook for your roommate’s rent.

Check out their current space

How people live how they’re going to live later. Or, alternately, there’s what people say they want and what people do right now.

Habit’s a really strong force, and no matter how much someone says they want to change, if there are dirty dishes in the sink when you’re over at their current place, those dishes will be hanging out in your sink in a roommate situation. If someone’s current living situation makes you itch—or they’re always complaining about it, and looking at you with beseeching eyes—they’re probably not a good candidate to take on as a roommate, because sometimes “I hate all these dirty dishes” means they’d love it if you did theirs.

Keep your standards high

If you find yourself going, “Well, maybe that endless dirty sock collection won’t be too bad. It’s only a year,” remember: Yes, it will.

Just like with dating, anything that already annoys you will be magnified by ten thousand when this person is the person you come home to. It’s tempting to try to let things slide—especially because we’re told that certain kinds of forbearance with other people’s tics is what makes us Good People—but again, just like dating, roommate relationships are a question of fit. The socks will drive you crazy. You’ll drive your roommate crazy grinding your teeth about the socks. Just hold out for someone you’re more compatible with and save the friendship.

Best of luck!

Condominium living is, in a lot of ways, living in the heart of our modern sharing economy (share and save). Tenants and owners in every condo building across Toronto pool what they’ve got to turn it into more: an exercise room instead of a hundred gym memberships, or a theatre room instead of a hundred movie tickets.

That ethic isn’t just about living space, though. There are multiple programs across Toronto dedicated to helping you save storage space, reduce the sheer spread of stuff, and expand your ability to hammer, cook, grow, and learn without having to shell out so much cash to do it.

Today, we’ll highlight places in Toronto you can extend your sharing ethic and pay a little to get access to a lot more—including and especially the communities they’ve built.

The Toronto Tool Library

Started out of a basement in Parkdale, the Toronto Tool Library was born from the same common-sense approach that realized two people might not maintain and use a pool, but two hundred could do it just fine: two friends realizing that most of the tools people spend money on—and genuinely need about once or twice a year—spend the other 363 days sitting idle.

Four years in, the Tool Library has over 1,200 members—and 13,000 loans—between their four locations, which encompass a maker space, laser cutters, a full wood shop, and 3D printers, as well as the paint, screwdrivers, garden trowels, and bike pumps they started out with.

A standard individual membership only sets you back $50 plus HST, and gives you access to TTL’s huge tool inventory, a range of workshops from 3D printing to drywall, and their community nights and parties, where you can meet other people who are really into fixing, building, and making things new.

The Kitchen Library

Spun off of the Tool Library, Toronto’s Kitchen Library is a haven for home cooks with small storage spaces—or a small budget. Even if you can’t afford a Vitamix, stand mixer, or espresso maker, the Kitchen Library has them, and it has your back.

With an inventory of over 50 appliances, you can borrow the kinds of tools you’ll need once in a while: to throw a holiday dinner, cater a party, or just play around at home. The library stocks cake pop makers, canning pots, dehydrators, 36-cup coffee urns, tomato strainers, crepe makers, and more, right down to a cookbook swap where you can trade out your already-loved recipes for a brand new set of challenges.

With one location on Eglinton east of Yonge, and one in Regent Park, the Kitchen Library’s accessible whether you’re downtown, midtown, or uptown, and runs you an almost ridiculously affordable $9/month—or $15 for a one-time, week-long loan—including advance reservations and discounts on Kitchen Library workshops, which range from practical meal planning on a budget and meal planning for teens to topics like making homemade pet treats and freezer cooking.

The Toronto Seed Library

Unlike the tool-based libraries, the Toronto Seed Library is absolutely free.

Run on donations, the Seed Library is all about spreading the love of gardening, seed saving, and urban agricultural skills across the city. So there’s no membership requirement beyond a mailing list signup, no check-out limits—although they ask that you take only what you will definitely use—and no stringent requirements except that you use the resource in good faith.

To help you potentially contribute and pay it forward, the Seed Library holds workshops on seed saving and gardening events, seed literacy classes, and offers guidance in getting your own garden to sustain itself indefinitely rather than buying seeds every season.

With a focus on open-pollinated and organic seeds, food plants, and heritage varieties, the Toronto Seed Library can be your gateway to that balcony garden—and cutting down your grocery bill while catching some sun this summer.

Bike Share Toronto

Though it’s growing increasingly common, not every condo building has a bike room, and management companies are understandably a little gun-shy about tracking road dirt through the hallways so you can store your ride in your unit. The answer? Toronto’s Bike Share program.

Bike Share has dozens of stations around the downtown area—Dufferin to the DVP, and Bloor to the lake—and multiple plans, depending on how you ride. Winter warriors can take advantage of a year-round pass that only costs $90, while cyclists who stick to the summer months can ride with the weather at $18 a month. If you’re just pulling out a bike for an occasional ride, or to do a few errands, a daily pass is only $7—just a touch more than two TTC fares.

Bike Share’s model is very much geared to short-term trips, errands, and commutes—there’s a usage fee as well, with each trip under 30 minutes free and a small, escalating charge for every half hour beyond that—which makes it ideal for riders who need a bike here and there, and don’t want to buy their own just to watch it gather dust.